I opened XMind and brainstormed a list of all areas that I deemed in need of a system. Sixteen major areas, 32 if  you count the sub-entries.

Gulp.

I feel very overwhelmed. I knew I was overwhelmed before but now it is weighing on me more because I see the sheer size of it right there. Is it even possible to get everything somehow under control?

I marked the areas where I have some sort of system with a yellow star. A green star is reserved for those where the system is more or less working beautifully for a certain amount of time; as is painfully clear, none deserved it.  A red star is cast on where a mediocre system used to be in place, but no one is really using it.

Everything else is run haphazardly, playing it by ear. When the stars align, and I’m in the right place, at the right time, thinking of the right thing, then I’ll get to it. Otherwise, things get shoved to the side until the situation (sometimes literally – see below) scratches me in the face.

Here are two examples – one silly, one more serious:

Personal care – children: I am of the firm belief that children’s nails must be growing twice as fast as ours – you know, adults. Maybe even three times. And yes, this tiny mediocre task consumes place in my head because I never remember to do it at the right time. I only remember when it is past bedtime, chaos has descended upon us and I’m craving peace and quiet like I crave ice-cream while pms-ing. So no, I don’t get to it until baby boy scratches my face and chest with his claws and I look like I own a demonized cat. “Damn, get those nail clippers like right NOW!”

Finances – personal: The only way my ad-hoc spending comes to a screeching halt is when the bank account goes red. My only saving grace is I pay the bills before I start remembering all the things I want. Still, this is a constant source of stress for me and I want out of this darned rat race.

To be honest, giving up and hiding below a blanket with some hazelnut chocolates sounds like a great plan right now.

But I won’t. Not this time. I’ll be back.